Category: FAQ Page: 2 of 3

I get asked these questions, well, frequently. Just click for the answers. I can’t guarantee that they are the right answers, but they are my best attempt to balance hope with reality. Many of them are lifted straight from emails I sent to some of the folks who have asked these questions previously. Some of the answers are a little disappointing or daunting. A guy sure doesn’t want to be a downer. But I wouldn’t want to insult you with anything less than a frank answer. When I say I’m a lucky guy, I mean it. I just wrote and wrote and wrote for years, and then one day (after nearly a decade of writing every day and submitting work every month) the marbles aligned, not that the metaphor is perfect. I’m still trying to keep those marbles in line, and the table is forever tipping.

The Rectum? Really?

In Coop I included a section on bovine artificial insemination. Although I strive to write only the most delicate prose, at one point I do set a scene in which the insemination technician (we just called him “the breeder man”) has his arm well up a cow’s rectum. This has elicited questions from the reading…View post

What Did You Write In My Book?

Sometimes I get emails from people wondering what I’ve written in their books.  When asked I personalize them as the reader wishes, but in general I sign a specific thing for each book: Population 485: Welcome to “Nobbern!” (We locals call New Auburn “Nobbern” or “Nauburn” or any variant spelling thereof.) Off Main Street: I…View post

What is Your Writing Process Like?

Organic, to put it politely.  I start jotting notes and fragments and throw them all into one big file.  These can be three-word scribbles from a gum wrapper or an 800-word brain dump.  Then I print them all out and try to sort them by some sort of topical means.  For instance I draw little…View post

How Do I Get An Agent?

Mighty tough.  I wrote for years without an agent, and then one found me.  Some time ago the site Rebecca’s Reads asked me to share how it happened.  Here’s what I wrote: “I got lucky. It’s that simple. I didn’t find an agent, she found me. I started freelancing in the late 1980s. Everything from…View post

How Do I Get Published/Make Living As A Writer?

[A NOTE FROM ALMOST 2019: This post got a boost recently. All in all it holds up well, but take into account it was written nearly a decade ago. Two bits of good news: Indie bookstores are doing better than it seemed they might, and paper is holding up against eBooks better than I predicted.] The…View post