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Home of Michael Perry – New York Times Bestselling Author, Humorist, Singer/Songwriter, Intermittent Pig Farmer

Posts Tagged ‘TRUCK: A LOVE STORY’

All About That Bass

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I have achieved the decor known as Midwestern bachelor eclectic, which is to say the large finless bass my great-grandfather caught hangs just below the picture of Johnny Cash, which is nicely accented by the vintage International pickup postcard. Whenever I am asked why I keep the bass, I point to the brass plate screwed to the wooden plaque, clearly stating that Frank J. Smetlak was a scientific taxidermist.

               – from Truck: A Love Story

Received an email out of the blue from the granddaughter of Frank J. Smatlak, who tells me Frank was from Haugen, Wisconsin, but also spent time in Wisconsin Dells, Rice Lake, and Eau Claire before dying in 1964–the year I was born. She also kindly points out that in Truck his surname was misspelled with an “e,” so as is standard Sneezing Cow policy, we now add this to the “Oops!” file.

Truck Photos

Have had some requests for photos of Irma, the main character in Truck: A Love Story (audio version available here).

Click on photos to enlarge.

Sometimes You Win One

Winter before last, my snow plow shoes finally wore out to the point even Tom couldn’t save them, so I bought a new pair.

Then early last winter we had a whopper of a snowstorm (little did we know it was only the beginning). I plowed out our driveway and outbuildings and the lane, then plowed out two of the neighbors. After parking the truck, I gave it the ol’ post-plow walk-around and discovered one of my brand new shoes was missing.

Let’s be polite, and say I was disheartened.

All-in-all, three hours in the plow truck and several miles of snowbanks. Somewhere out there, buried in all that white, was a $34 piece of iron. I retraced my work, expecting to find nothing, and found exactly that.

Then last week I was typing in my little room with the window open for the first time all year when it occurred to me I ought to take a walk along the driveway to see if I could find that shoe. I got halfway to the mailbox but the snowbanks still hadn’t completely melted, so I turned and headed the other way, out the ridge where I plowed the lane.

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Then I spotted something…

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I took a closer look…

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I followed the trail of spacers and found…

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Price tag still on it! And then, to complete the trifecta…

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It’s nice to see the daffodils sprout and all that, but that’s pretty much the most beautiful thing I’ve seen all spring. Felt like I won the lottery…for $34.

Rule is, if yer gonna grump about bad luck, you gotta give the cosmos a nod when you get good luck. So there y’go.

Shine Up Your Country

Recent Ray Wylie Hubbard discussion about the state of country music got me to thinking about something I wrote in Truck: A Love Story (Full disclosure: I once did a story for a men’s magazine in which I had my eyebrows plucked and got a spray tan, so I got no room to talk.) (Also, only reason I didn’t wax my abs is ’cause I got no abs.):

This new stuff suffers from overgrooming. Even the redneckiest tunes ring tinny. One sometimes fears the lyrics of the latest busted-heart song were transposed from a marriage encounter handbook. It isn’t that today’s superstars aren’t talented and hardworking. It’s just that their way of doing things has passed me by. I look at the pretty cowboy on the Jumbotron and think, It is one thing to polish your craft, it is quite another to wax your abs. Recipe for the real deal: Combine two parts busted heart with one part busted knuckles, sprinkle with cheap trucker speed and crushed Valium to taste, and marinate in hard luck and leaky motor oil. Stir in Genesis and Revelation, add a dash of hope, and finish off while being forcibly evicted from a hotel bar. Hello, Tanya Tucker.

COOP and TRUCK Now Available in Audiobook Format

Very happy to announce that the audiobook versions of Coop and Truck (both read by Mike) are now available from Audible.com.

Also happy to announce that the audiobook version of Coop is available from iTunes. HOWEVER: The version of TRUCK that is on iTunes is NOT narrated by me…this is due to a mixup too labyrinthine to explain and is currently being rectified (nothing nefarious, the voice talent is a great guy, this had to do with miscommunication). When the proper version is posted, we’ll link, you bet.

If you still prefer your audiobooks on CD, hang in there, they’re in the hopper.