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Home of Michael Perry – Author, Humorist, Singer/Songwriter, Amateur Pig Farmer

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Posts Tagged ‘oops!’

Then There Was The Time…

Reading the responses to yesterday’s post I am reminded of the time I was doing some spring plowing for my brother. The tire on the plow’s trailing wheel went flat, so I pulled out at the end of the row and headed home, not noticing that the combination of the flat tire and the uphill access to the county road affected the hypotenuse of the plow’s relationship to the earth in such a manner that the first plowshare slipped neatly beneath the asphalt and rolled up a patch the size and thickness of a 100-pound brownie. There followed a rather desperate display in which I performed a hyperkinetic two-footed stomp-dance, trying to get the brownie back in the pan, as it were, before someone in an orange truck happened by…

Notes From an Ambulance Call

Just got back from a first responder run.  Enroute, I heard the following radio traffic, which made me smile and may give you an indication of the territory around here:

DISPATCH: Sheriff Deputy #123, please respond to XXX Blank Road, make contact regarding a report of stolen chickens.

DEPUTY #345: Dispatch, be advised, Deputy #123 is unavailable, he’s out chasing cows.

Unrelated, but perhaps of interest, while responding to this call I was also reminded that the reason they put that little “ON/OFF” switch on the controller for your snowplow is to prevent the possibility of your rescue kit tipping off the kid’s car seat and landing on the controller, at which you suddenly find yourself plowing bare asphalt at, oh, too-many-miles-per-hour.

Deepwater Dialing

Took my daughter AND my cellphone swimming last night.

For the foreseeable future, your calls will not be returned.

And yes, although I appreciate all the tips I’m getting, I’ve tried all the tricks (including the ones that rescued it last time, when I put it in the clothes washer), but it refuses to resurrect.

“Oops” in Person

Spoke at an event in Green Bay and got to meet a guy named Guy, which was fun because thanks to Guy, the new paperback version of Coop contains two less [fewer] errors than the hardcover.

Guy’s a professional, and on page 117 of the Coop hardcover, he suggested the following change:

[an extraneous "is" six lines up from the bottom of the page] This is only forces her…

On page 335 he suggested the following change:

[top line] …often enough now that it sometimes it takes me…

Done, and done.

Thanks, Guy, and nice to meet you the other night.

As regular visitors know, I happily post my oopses.  As long as everyone remains civil.

For a sampling of other errors, flick back and forth through the Oops! tag  pages.

Morning TV in Milwaukee

Here’s a link to The Morning Blend interview I did with Molly and Tiffany.  First TV stop of the Coop paperback tour.  The baby food reference at the end was related to the preceding piece in which there was discussion of Jennifer Aniston’s legs and “baby food diet”.  Good luck with that.

Also of interest to me, if no one else.  On shows like this, you have a brief amount of time to tell as much of the story as you can.  Plus, it’s early.  So I tend to go a mile-a-minute even though 30 minutes previous I was groggily bumping around a dark hotel room.   This leads to mental fuzz.  Note how I mention that the coop wasn’t finished before the first egg came; then note how I speak of my daughter going to the coop to find that first egg.  Now I’ve got to go back and check the book and see what part of that quote is accurate.  Sheesh.  Glad I wasn’t testifying before Congress.

Thank You, UU

Read and spoke at the local Unitarian Universalist Church today.  About faith, shaken faith, wandering versus seeking, the idea of universal humility, and how our spiritual foundations shape us long after we leave the house.  I also spoke of my gratitude for my children (their presence forces me to examine my heart on a daily basis) and my parents (their faithful example influences me always, even though some might not see it).  I would add my wife, who endures my wobbly-headed ways.

Thank you to the local congregation for the invitation.  It was a blessing to be surrounded by thoughtful folks open to a multitude of perspectives.

As a side note, because of the nature of the discussion (frankly, I feel in way over my head with these things and suspect I operate at the theological equivalent of a late-night freshman dorm room chat), I was more nervous at the podium than I have been in a long time.  This led to one of the most eye-widening “misspeaks” of my career.  While attempting to read the following line from Coop,

…an itinerant evangelist showed up late for gospel meeting and crept into the back row…

I got tongue-tied and said “crapped” instead of “crept.”

Hoooo.  I’m a guy who’s not ashamed to go for a laugh (oh, and it got one!), but that one left me red-faced.

At Least I Don’t Have To Go To The Principal’s Office

Mr. Big-Shot Writer Dude just received an email from his 7th grade English teacher saying she’s enjoying Coop but that on page 138 I should have used “quietly” rather than “quiet.”

She is correct, of course.  I am told she is re-sharpening her red pen.  I expect at least three more emails.

Thanks, Mrs. R.  And thanks even more for that blackboard assignment back in 197? that helped me fall for writing in the first place.

Retired, you say?  A teacher is always teaching.

OOPS! in Coop #6

Page 107, line four: …for my one of my sisters…

My, my.

Thank you to Paula, longsufferingtime friend in Nebraska.  Many times I have raided her refrigerator.